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9/16/2014 6:02 pm  #1


New pronouns (again)

I'm sorry to throw everyone off, but I'd like to be referred to by female or neutral pronouns. The male thing just wasn't workin' for me.

I'm still going to go by Matt.

More explanation can be found on my blog.

Thanks everyone for being so accommodating and I'm really sorry to fuck with you.

Last edited by Matt (9/16/2014 6:04 pm)

 

9/16/2014 6:44 pm  #2


Re: New pronouns (again)

No problem! I know several people who've taken a while to figure these things out. Do you have a preference between female and neutral?


My girls: Kirsten Johanna Larson (c. 1854: Ryd, Sweden/ Minnesota), Olive Leah Fonseca (c. 1887: East London, UK), Eva Marie Graff (c. 1926: Upper Michigan)
 

9/16/2014 6:52 pm  #3


Re: New pronouns (again)

You're not fucking with us! Personal identity is something we each will grapple with multiple times in our lives. Could you please share a link to your blog?

Also, what would neutral pronouns be? There's no way in hell I'll be referring to you as "it" and I can't imagine you'd be okay with that either so I must be missing something.

 

9/16/2014 6:58 pm  #4


Re: New pronouns (again)

honilee wrote:

You're not fucking with us! Personal identity is something we each will grapple with multiple times in our lives. Could you please share a link to your blog?

Also, what would neutral pronouns be? There's no way in hell I'll be referring to you as "it" and I can't imagine you'd be okay with that either so I must be missing something.

The neutral pronouns I'm thinking of are "they/them/their". The blog's in my signature.

@ellaweasel - I'm not sure yet which I prefer. I figure I should give them both a try before I decide, though I'm more used to female.

Thanks!

     Thread Starter
 

9/16/2014 7:56 pm  #5


Re: New pronouns (again)

not a problem at all, Matt! thank you for keeping us updated. <3


~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*
Dolls of Color on tumblr
https://farm6.staticflickr.com/5571/15118560417_986c681bc7.jpg
 

9/16/2014 8:34 pm  #6


Re: New pronouns (again)

You're not fucking with us, Matt!  You don't need to worry about accommodating us, at all -- that should seriously be the last thing on your mind.  You haven't fucked anything up.  Gender fluidity is a really wonderful and beautiful thing, and you're still just in the process of figuring out who you are.  That's 100% okay and completely normal, especially at this stage in your life.  It's okay not to fit neatly into a little box, either right now or anytime later.  I myself present as all over the place on the gender spectrum -- butch haircut, no makeup, straight figure, but I wear dresses a lot.  And I send you lots of solidarity hugs.

You're very sweet for keeping us updated.  I am more than happy to use female and/or neutral pronouns for you -- no problem at all, for realz.

 

9/16/2014 8:39 pm  #7


Re: New pronouns (again)

No problem, Matt! I think it's awesome the way that you are working through what identity works for you right now. And you don't need to apologize for fucking with us, because you're not - the way that being a Decent Human Being works is that when someone says "hey folks, here's the pronoun I'm comfortable with right this minute!", we all say "sounds great!" and then we do our best to respect that. (At camp we actually do pronoun check-ins at least once a day, sometimes more, to make sure that our campers are comfortable with the way that everyone else is addressing them at any given moment. Which anecdote is intended to make you feel not-silly-or-otherwise-uncomfortable to have requested a pronoun change!)

Last edited by marycontraria (9/16/2014 8:41 pm)


I am starry-eyed and vaguely discontented.
 

9/16/2014 9:03 pm  #8


Re: New pronouns (again)

http://i.imgur.com/Uhc8QV9.gif


Adventure awaits!♥
 
 

9/16/2014 9:05 pm  #9


Re: New pronouns (again)

I should warn you that I have memory issues, and it is extremely probable that I -will not remember- your pronouns of choice if they don't square with the apparent genderdness of your username. Please don't take it personally if I say 'he', and (not that you would, you are a gem of a human being) please don't tell me I'm being rude or not trying, 'you need to just try harder to remember,' or anything like that. My brain just does not retain information the way I would very much like it to. Thank you for understanding.

 

9/16/2014 10:21 pm  #10


Re: New pronouns (again)

Actually, do you think that there would/could be a way for people to include preferred pronouns in their basic user info so that it shows up right under the username? I know people who routinely wear nametags or buttons that say "my pronouns are _______" and it is super helpful.


I am starry-eyed and vaguely discontented.
 

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